Man Defends Himself With Master Sword Replica

Long story short, Zelda gets pissed at Link and calls her ex-husband Ganon, who then arrives at Link's house and charges him like a madman. But Link remembers he has the Master Sword stashed in his closet, whips it out, and stabs Ganon multiple times until…

Okay, here's the real story, as reported by Click2Houston.com. In Katy, Texas last Saturday night, Eugene Thompson had an argument with his girlfriend at his home. She then called her estranged husband, who arrived at the house at 10pm, and she let him inside.

This prompted silent protagonist Thompson to sprint to the back bedroom, demanding his assailant to leave the house and drawing forth from his closet "one of" his replica Master Swords from The Legend of Zelda that he uses for "anime conventions and stuff." The assailant, perhaps believing it to be "a toy," charged Thompson and instead found the sword to be well-sharpened and blessed by the goddesses.

Though Thompson managed to lock the man out of the house, he was able to power up with a raging red aura and break through the front door anyway. The two men fought over the sword and in the scuffle, the man was stabbed twice, once in the chest and once in the leg.

During the fight, he also tried picking up a flower pot taking a page from Link's playbook and smashing it against Thompson's head. One shiny green hexagonal stone fell out.

The estranged husband is at Memorial Hermann Hospital in serious condition. The prick Zelda Thompson's girlfriend was not injured in the fight.

[Thanks, UghRochester, for the tip!]

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